‘New year new you!’ You exclaim as I sit sorrowful on the porch step looking out at the blinding grey of another Monday morning, in another year again with no one to share it with.
‘It’s easy for you to say it, Charlie, but the day a new me comes around will in be a month of Sundays, and in the world of never ending Mondays that I live in, it feels ridiculously unlikely, don’t you think!’
You stared at me in that way in that moment. A way I didn’t know about then but now I look back and see it so very clearly.
‘Jenny, why do you do this to yourself. Open your eyes and see the bright things. You always stare at the grey! Look around!’ Your eyes where so wide with optimism and love that day. You always new how to cheer me up. Always.

That day was the beginning to the end I stand in now writing this. The end I never imagined of. The perfect beginning to a year exactly a year after the last dismal end of a year I would face.
Tbc.

(via nightmareblisss)

(via nightmareblisss)

(Source: livinoffthegrid, via loser-t0wn)

campbelltoe:

dearyall

I was walking with a hastened pace, down the never ending, bustling street. Crystals stars started to fall from the sky catching on my nose and eyelashes on its hurried journey to the stone cold ground. As my feet hit the ground a crunch echoed to my ear from the icy snow blanket. On my mind was not the Christmas cheer that surrounded me, but the lack of you on my arm. Where were you in my life?

The Christmas before on that very day, we had walked that very street, dreaming of the future Christmas’s together. What laid before us then was a life filled with children, laughter and constant contentment. What ever happened to us.

The thoughts of your pained me like a blade through my neck. My blood froze and my beating heart silenced itself. I was struggling to breath and in a sudden moment, I fell to the ground. As I lay there with the sound of voices buzzing around me, you disappear from my mind. You walked out. i couldn’t see the face anymore. My head throbbed and as I came round to consciousness, I noticed a scarlet coloured pool around my head. I could see nothing about my life and in that moment, in all the rush and panic, I was calm in my head. My life was as clear as the ice that I was surrounded by. I had nothing in my mind and the pain in my head was no longer you. it became actual pain and that was the most refreshing pain I had ever felt in my life.

In pain I lost you, In pain I forgot you, and now in clarity and happiness, i remember you once more, absent of all the pain, and with the truest and fondest nostalgia.

I adore elephants :) I rode one this summer :)

It’s beginning to feel a lot like Christmas :)

In this moment in time on this huge planet, I stand. I am here, waiting for the rest of my life to unfold graciously before my feet. The path may waver but my heart stays strong, beating in time with the rhythm of my hectic life.

I do not pretend to smile and brush over the creases, you must take them with you and stride on with even more fury in your eyes and such determination to succeed in all you plan.

Make yourself heard doing what you want to do. Just live as you, yourself, imagine you living and I promise you will face few regrets along the winding dirt track of life.

the next few weeks I have tons of uni work to crack on with so the posts may be short, but they will sure be sweet and I will try my best to use Queuepost to get the word of mine heard!! :) So follow if you like me and yeah help me get my writing heard out there in the tumblr world as criticism and comments and reblogs reallyyyy help my writing develop :) thanks :) cosmicrocks :)

time is not with me today.

Today it fights me. I want to sleep but cannot because it will not allow my eyes to rest. I will be a broken body in the early morning, when my legs attempt to drag me forth from my cosy, warm bed.

Time is always against my body, a constant fight. Time always wins and my body ends, cracked and sore on the floor, beaten by the lack of levy between time and tasks.

two lines cross over, the symbol is clear. or is it.

Sacrifice

Pain

Healing

Freedom

Liberation

Religion

Health

Death

Symbols are twisted and read many ways. A science to uncover, different to every eye, every mind. What I see you cannot, and what you see I cannot. Each to there own culture’s teaching.